Disappointment

I had total disappointment today when I got on the scale. I was expecting to see a loss on the scale and saw a BIG jump. The scale said 236.5. I got on it several times, moved it and still nothing 236.5. Now I haven't been over 235 in so long and it just pissed me tremendously. My FIL is now weighing 220, that is 15 pounds less than me. How freaking sad is that. My BIL also weighs 220. I am a fat ass. My DH is married to a FAT ASS, who is fatter than his daddy and all of his brothers. Plain and simple. So to kick my discouraged ass to the curb, I got on my bike this morning after the scale incident and rode for 20 minutes non stop and felt awesome afterwards. I was very self conscious of what I ate and avoided my mom's house. So let's see how today went foodwise

Breakfast
1/2 banana
cereal and milk

Lunch
turkey sandwich w/dijonnaise, cheese, and a tomato
rest of the tomato and another one with low fat ranch

Snack
goldfish
chocolate pudding w/cool whip

Dinner
meatloaf dinner
frozen veggies

I am having problems remembering if I ate anything else. I did drink a bunch of water and I sure as hell hope I can get some of this weight off. I wanted to be 225 by my birthday but that is seeming less and less likely. TOmorrow is our 3 year anniversary and we're planning on going eat out and of course I want to eat and not be OP, but I'm going to do my WATP sometime and then I won't feel so guilty for eating. It's a pain in the ass right now for me!!!

Until tomorrow,
JTP